June 30, 2008 - Six down, two to go...

I met with Dr. VanderMolen today at 9 am to discuss Thursday's meltdown. He said just what I thought he'd say. We don't know the health history of those patients complaining and that the folks who handle it well don't typically get on the computer to say everything was fine. He deals with this everyday, and I trust him. If he's not concerned, I'm not concerned. It's all good.

I went into chemo at 10 am and was done by 3 pm. Jill got the needle in the first time, and it hurt like heck. I also had to have a shot for my red blood cell count. Helen is really good at giving those shots. They typically hurt really badly, but I hardly felt a thing. Good job Helen!!! That's the first time they ever did it right there after chemo. I'll go for my Neulasta shot tomorrow.

I'm tired, but I've been researching how to get started in photography. My sweet sis is here making dinner for us. She's the breast!

Have a great evening!

June 27, 2008 - My Meltdown is Over

OK. . . So a couple of days ago I didn't get much sleep, and I had a meltdown. That's only my 2nd meltdown since my diagnosis, so I'd say my positivity record is still pretty good. I was better yesterday.

While I'm still going to discuss my concerns with my doctor before Monday's Taxol treatment, I've done a little more research and found that most people tolerate Taxol pretty well. The website I had found on the 25th didn't mention anything about the health status of the people who were reporting. For all I know, they could have had pre-existing conditions (obesity, hypertension, etc.) and may have not been in the best shape to begin with. They may eat McDonald's everyday for all I know. I am taking care of myself, darn it! I drink Kangen water (alkaline water) to reduce the amount of acid in my body. You know, cancer can't survive in an alkaline environment! It thrives on an acidic environment. I eat lots of fruits and vegetables, and I rarely eat red meat. It's all good!

One reason I had my meltdown: When I got my "cancer side effects talk" from Jackie at Dr. VanderMolen's office before I started my Adriamycin/Cytoxan treatments, she told me we'd discuss the effects of Taxol before I started my Taxol treatments. Well, then her daughter had twins and she's been off helping her ever since. I never got my Jackie Taxol talk, and I feel like that may have helped me prepare. Congrats on the twins. I'm really happy for their family, but what about ME? Sorry to be so selfish, but who's the back up for Jackie? Waaaaaaaaa. OK. I'm over it.

I'm going out tonight to celebrate a very good friend's 50th birthday. It's a girls night out. Dueling pianos and Mexican food. Woo hoo! Should be fun.

June 25, 2008 - What Am I Doing Taking Taxol?

I woke up at 2:30 this morning and couldn't go back to sleep. I finally got up at 4:30 and got on the computer. I had read in a book yesterday where the author had said he was against chemotherapy and that other treatments should be sought out first. I had felt that I didn't have enough time to research alternative treatments because my cancer was so aggressive (Bloom Richardson scale of 9 out of 9, with cells dividing approximiately every 40 days). The doctor had told me side effects of Taxol would be the possibility of neuropathy (numbness in hands and feet), and joint pain, which typically gets restored after the end of chemotherapy.

I did a little research on Taxol this morning, and all I can ask myself is WHAT AM I DOING TAKING THIS DRUG? There are women my age who complain that the neuropathy and the joint pain never go away and that in their 40's they walk like they are in their 90's. Here is the site I read this morning: http://www.askapatient.com/viewrating.asp?drug=20262&name=TAXOL

It's research time! I want to be active, not crippled.

June 22, 2008 - Red Bumps are Better

The doctor wanted to see me on Friday. The red bumps are an allergic reaction to the Taxol chemo treatment. He gave me a steroid shot, which didn't hurt at all. I was so happy for about 3 minutes. Then the pain started and didn't leave for 10 minutes. I didn't cry though. Yeah.... waaaa, waaa, waaa. (but it hurt. I swear.) Enough of that. He also gave me some prednizone, which I took on Saturday and Sunday, and the bumps are about 50% better. They don't itch anymore.

Here's a picture of the bumps (taken Friday night). If you click on the picture, it will enlarge, allowing you to see my white, freckly, red-bumpy legs. Someone give Vogue my phone number!

June 20, 2008 - Effects of Taxol

Today is the Friday following my Monday Taxol chemotherapy treatment. This was the first treatment of this chemo, and I thought it would be a piece of cake compared to the Adriamycin/Cytoxan combo. It's not easier at all....just different.

At Monday's treatment they discovered that my red cells were still low, so on Tuesday I got to have my normal Neulasta shot for my white cells and I got another shot for the red cells. Fortunately, my nurse Cam is as gentle as can be, and she found a way to make the pain minimal. Both shots are thick and come right out of the refrigerator. The combination of those two things can make the administration pretty painful.

By Wednesday I was dragging. On Thursday I knew firsthand what they meant by "you might experience fatigue." Fortunately I have more energy today. I've lost a total of 10 pounds since chemo started. No more muffin top! Woo hoo! I promised Clayton that if my weight loss got to 15 pounds that I'd get serious about forcing myself to eat. Right now, I'm lovin the chemo-induced diet plan. I eat 3 meals a day, just not a whole lot at any one sitting.

I have a call in to the doc to find out what I can take for my new 'freckles'. He had already seen the red bumps on my legs, but now they are ten times worse, and they itch like crazy. They have spread from just the bottom of my legs to the entire surface of my legs, my stomach, my arms, and my back. Help!

All in all, I'm still hangin in there. I still feel like it could be much worse. Just three more chemo treatments to go. I guess radiation starts about 2 weeks after that.

June 16, 2008 - First Day of Taxol Treatment

My shingles are all dried up, and there is pain in the surrounding area, but it comes in waves. I think I may have the most mild case of any shingles case that there ever was. :-) Thanks God!

Wanda took me to breakfast at 9:00 this morning. Thanks Wanda!!! Since we had about 45 minutes to kill before my chemo appt, what else could we do, but SHOP? I bought a fabulous green and white knit dress. Love it! I also bought a Volcom t-shirt for Parker (my 11-year-old). He loved it.

We got to chemo at 11:00 and got called upstairs at 11:20. Jill found a great vein, and the needle barely hurt going in. I looked at Wanda and said, "she's so good".

I guess I celebrated a little too early. We hit scar tissue after the needle was in, so she had to pick another vein. The second one hurt like......... well, it hurt about 10 times worse than the first one. Waaaaaa. OK. Enough of that. It doesn't hurt now, so I'm happy.

With Taxol, they first gave me a drip (bag) of Zantac to take care of any stomach acids that might build up. Then I got a push (syringe) of Benadryl to take care of potential allergic reactions. Within seconds after getting the Benadryl, I could feel 'lightness' from my head to my feet. Very strange, and not fun for me. It subsided within a few minutes, and I pretty much fell asleep immediately.

I got a drip of Taxol (chemo) that lasted 3 hours. I just slept and slept. I woke up later to the sound of my own gas. It was pretty embarassing. I couldn't even look up to see who might have heard it. I just kept my eyes closed and shook my head in disbelief and went back to sleep. I do know that if it woke me up....others had to have heard it. Ugh. Now....to me....it's just funny.

I was out of there at 4:30. (5 1/2 hours today).

After chemo, we went to Parker's end of season baseball party. I ate well and had a good time and felt no side effects of the long chemo day. The nurse said I should feel achy for a couple of days, and the patient next to me said hers was horrible. I'm sorry she experienced that. Mine will be mild.

Five treatments down -- 3 to go (plus the 2 weeks of side effects following the last one).

Until the next blog.... keep doing those self checks and urging your loved ones to do them. If a lump is found and is determined to be cancerous, there are many factors in determining what the treatment process will be. Don't ignore anything. THE EARLIER THE DETECTION, THE EASIER THE TREATMENTS.

June 15, 2008 - Fathers Day - Great Day

We had a great day today. Clayton golfed early this morning. I made breakfast for everyone (OK - Cassie did the potatoes), and we packed up and went to the beach. Clayton and Parker attempted surf fishing for about the 5th time and the poor guys still didn't catch anything. Cassie and I just relaxed on the beach. I read my book in the shade, and then we all played frisbee and smashball. Of course, I was covered head to toe to avoid getting that severe sunburn that is threatened with chemotherapy.

Guess what I did when I got home? Yep. I took a nap. Man are my calves sore!

We ordered Outback curbside, and we're about to have cheesecake to finish off a great day!

Food tastes good sometimes and strange other times. I don't think I'll try bleu cheese dressing for awhile. It tasted horrible to me today. The tilapia was awesome, though. ;-)

June 12, 2008 - Shingles Only

First I must say Happy Birthday to Carson, my childhood friend. I love ya like a sister!

Next, I saw the doctor today and he could see that the whopping 800 mg dosage of Acyclovir 3 times per day is working to send those shingles back from whence they came. After 10 days of that heavy dosage schedule, he'll put me on 400 mg once per day until chemo is over. I talked to him about the contagious nature of my shingles because I wanted to take a friend's child home from school. He looked at me and said very seriously, "I wouldn't do it." I asked if it could be spread airborne, and he said it could. So, I had to tell my buddy to find another ride for her kid. That stunk. Once this little 1-inch square of shingles are dried up, I'm no longer contagious.

Nurse Anthony attempted to draw blood. I always hate it when a nurse sticks the needle in and I don't see red, because that means they are gonna wiggle the needle around under my skin. THAT gives me the heebie jeebies. As he was wiggling the needle, Nurse Clarissa walked by, so I said to Anthony in a whining voice, so that Clarissa could hear, "Clarissa always gets it the first time." Ummmmmmmm.... back up ... did I really just say that? I apologized to Anthony. He told me it was ok (but to me it wasn't). He promised to get it right the next time. He kept his promise.

My blood levels were good enough to do chemo this coming Monday. These red and white blood cell booster shots are pretty awesome and allow me to stay on my schedule of being done by July 28.

Hey - remember that cold I got before chemo? Yeah, the one I took antibiotics for? Well, it's STILL here. The antibiotics improved it (no more yellow/green stuff), but I'm still coughing on a daily basis.

I watched a recording of Oprah last night. She featured a story of a young girl, Kris Carr, who has stage four cancer and has found a way to keep her cancer from growing. She wrote a book called Crazy, Sexy, Cancer. She's amazing. I'm going to read that book. I looked at her website today, and it put me in a great mood. http://crazysexycancer.blogspot.com/

The other story on Oprah was about a man, Randy Pausch, from Carnegie Mellon University. He has terminal pancreatic cancer, and although extremely unfortunate, his story is extremely motivational. http://download.srv.cs.cmu.edu/~pausch/

Thanks for reading!!!

June 9, 2008 - Finished with Adriamycin and Cytoxan

I had my last chemo treatment with Adriamycin and Cytoxan last Monday. Thank goodness that one's over. I'm not sure what other side effects it would bring if I had to have any more treatments of that combination. On Saturday, Parker noticed a sore near my left armpit. It looked like a hole in my skin. By Sunday, there were blisters formed. The doctor confirmed today that it's SHINGLES. Ugh! I have heard that shingles are extremely itchy and painful. Right now, they are just a little sore, so I feel fortunate. The doctor gave me a prescription of 800 mg of Acyclovir that I will take 3x per day, and I have to see him again on Thursday for a follow up. Hopefully it will start clearing up before it gets worse.

My red blood cell count was pretty low today, so I got to have a shot to boost them. OUCH. That one hurt. The doctor said that typically people have to have them before now, so I'm doing great.
I start Taxol chemo treatments on Monday. I hear they are more mild than the previous combination of treatments. I'm halfway through with chemo. Yay!

Sorry I don't update more often, but it's typically the same stuff, different day.